Oh hi, blog. It's me, Leyla.

Oh hi, blog. It's me, Leyla.

It's been a while. I know it's a cliche, but I haven't been ignoring you...I've just been distracted with other...things.

The other "things" are really just one thing....it's called sleep.

No, I haven't turned into a lazy bum who sleeps all day long. There's a reason I crash as soon as I get home from work.

Turns out, plus means positive. And the first plus sign wasn't a fluke. 

I took that test like three days after my last post. I never really meant to quit blogging...I was just too tired. And unmotivated. And scared, and confused, and frustrated. Probably all the emotions that are expected when your husband is unemployed and you live three hours away from your mom and you discover you're having an unplanned baby. 

In a perfect world, Isaac and I would be living in a cute little home in Bend as first-time homeowners, he would have full-time work and I would have a part-time consulting gig. I would carefully document my pregnancy either on the blog or in a cute flowery little journal, and take weekly belly pictures and be as happy and cute as can be in adorable maternity clothes. 

In reality....I haven't written/blogged/journaled one single minute of this pregnancy, and I'm going to slap the next person who sits in my office and tells me "Oh, I loved being pregnant."

Really?! Really??!?!? What part of throwing up, insane fatigue, sore boobs, hating your favorite foods, growing out of all your clothes, having no energy, taking gross vitamins, and crying at the drop of a hat is fun? 

Deep breath. 

It's gotten marginally better. I can make it through dinner now - and it all stays in my stomach. I haven't cried over nothing in more a week, and I've acquired a few maternity clothes that I don't hate. 

Plus, finding out yesterday we can call the baby a "she" instead of an "it" makes it something to look forward to.